Building...

I attached a photo to my profile today, after much debate about what I should put on display for people to see.  I like the ability to put my thoughts out there, like a diary and yet I want to keep some sense of privacy.  I know some people would have no problem posting a photo of themselves, but to me that is too personal.  Do we not make judgements based on how someone looks?  Why then, if this post is to share ideas, should it matter what a person looks like?  And who's to say that one photo of myself will represent the many sides of my personality on any given day?  And so I chose a photo of a project I completed with my husband...

The photo is of a system of planters we built in our yard.  After years of fighting to keep weeds out of the garden with the many stones collected from around the yard, I decided we must win the war against the weeds.  It just so happened, that at the same time, my husband was working on a printing job for a company that makes these and many other brick/stone products.

Some might say that this is not a task to be under taken by yourself, but rather one that you should bring in the professional landscaper for.  But to me this was an opportunity to work with a different set of artistic tools.  The blocks as my medium and the ground as my canvas.

So how does one do something like this?  Well, if you are me, you plan it all out.  I took the demention of the blocks and began playing with different designs/pattern ideas, while looking at the area I wanted to cover with my design.  I went so far as to create a template of each wall I wanted to build, in a computer program.  This not only let me see what the finished product would look like, but it allowed me to accurately calculate the number of blocks I would need for the project.

The tough part was the digging.  Living in Western Mass and on the side of a hill, like we do, one encounters many a rock when digging.  You end up spending most of your time trying to dig them free from the surrounding earth so you can continue digging.  Then most of them are heavier than the blocks you have purchased to build the raised planters.

Once we cleared the area, we had to make sure our ditches were deep enough for the bottom courses of each wall.  Then the tamping and the leveling begins.  Then the crumbled rock like material that you must lay down, tamp and level.  Finally, you begin to lay the block.

This is a slow but rewarding process.  If your base is not tamped and level, your wall is not going to stand the test of time.  So as you itch to start laying block, you must patiently make sure the preparations are right.  Then with each block, you must align, level, tap, turn the block or grab another that fits better.  And finally the cap stones are set in place and you have only to back fill around your work.

It's been years now since we built those planters, some of the plants have died, others have taken over and alas, there are even some weeds, but the planter still stands solid and strong, just where we intended it to be.

So the photo I have posted in my profile has significance in that life is about building.  Maybe it is building friendships or family or business.  Maybe it is building new beginnings.  All of those need strong foundations, care, patiences and time.  And so I end this post to go and work on all that I am building in my life...

Sucker Punched

So you have been dreaming for a long time of having a little girl.  Finally, your prayers are answered and you are holding her.  She is so little, so precious and sweet.  So were your boys, and yet she is more so.  Is it just psychological or is it really so - that is a debate for another day.  But let me say that I've noticed that daddy talks to Little Miss differently than the he does the boys.

She is healthy and meeting all her milestones.  And yet you notice that something is not right with one of her eyes.  The pediatrician insists that her eyes are fine.  But you continue to see something is not right. 

So you call the pediatric optomitrist for an evaluation.  At first, he does not see what you are talking about.  But you persist, because you know what you have seen and the doctor finally sees it too.  You are told your little girl needs glasses.  There is relief, and on some level sadness. 

Your girl is always very alert and looking around at everything, but you realize once you get the glasses on her, that she is now DRINKING in all the details she has been missing.  So the slight sadness you have felt is gone, because you now can see for yourself that she is seeing better than before.  Now if you can just get her to keep the darned things on and stop sucking the protective rubber tubes off the cables, like they are speghetti, everything will be great.

But you must return for another visit to the eye doctor for a follow up.  And then another visit a few months later.  It is at this visit that you see the wheels of the doctor's mind turning.  He is trying to decide wheather to leave the prescription as is or change it.  Finally, he decides to increase the perscription. 

Now the new perscription is stronger and you would think it would be solving the problem, but you are noticing the initial problem is more prominent with the new script and worry if the prescription is correct.  A quick consult with the doctor to express your concerns and you are told your Little Miss may be looking at surgery.

The air goes out of the room and there is the roaring in your ears.  You have just been sucker punched.

Now you must fight your way back to ask a few more questions.  Is there nothing more we can do with glasses?  Isn't she too little for something like this?  And all the time you want to scream "NOT MY LITTLE GIRL!"

But it is no use, you need to get out of the exam room and call your husband, to break the news.  You hear him repeating what you just had to go through... no air, roaring in the ears, a million questions, denial.

You tell him that there will be another exam before it is definate and he must be at this appointment to ask questions.  He acknowledges, that yes, he does and will.

Fast forward a couple of months.  The appointment has arrived and it is definate that she will need surgery.  I am at the point of having done a little research and beginning to ask questions, but my husband is there as if this is the first time he has heard this.  He has been sucker punched.  He is of little use in the ask questions department.

For him, it is his little girl.  He seems shocked and unable to get his mind around what he is hearing.  How can this be happening to his little girl? 

I want to scream "Snap out of it!", but I don't.  I ask a few questions that come to mind and feel that although they are answered to satisfaction, I know there are more I should be asking.  Yet I can't seem to think of them.  The doctor has a full schedule and needs to move on, but he wants to see her again in a month. 

Time to think, time to do more research, time to worry over our little girl.  No surgery will be scheduled until after the next appointment.  I am both relieved and anxious.  I want to put this off and yet I want to fix this problem now.  I want to protect her and fight for her.

And as I drive her to and from these appointments, losing sleep over her; I feel a love for this little wonder who is my Little Miss, that is so very deep.  This is love that knows no bounds.  And as I recover from the sucker punch, I know that I would not have it any other way.

I love my Little Miss.

Short And Sweet

It's been a while since the last post. When you have four kids, time seems to either fly by or stand completely still. Lately, it has been flying by and seems to be gaining speed.

We had the best time last weekend, getting together with family from near and far. My father and his second wife came over from England and my uncle and aunt were down from Maine. Cousins were in attendance and all of my siblings and their spouses and kids. Quite a lot of people. It was wonderful to see everyone and there were lots of photo opportunities.

The reason for the gathering, (yes, we seem to need a reason) was to celebrate the first time ever performance of a play my father wrote some ten years ago. "As Fair As You Were". (I've not seen the play yet, but plan to this coming weekend.)

So there you have it, short and sweet.

Chalk Lines vs Technology

It's been a hectic couple of weeks since my last post. No details on that, as I want to forget most of those events.

Today's goal is to reformat the blog site. This is quite challenging, as I am not a highly technology literate person. I know what I want it to look like, but getting there seems insurmountable.

Now, if this was to be created in chalk, I could physically take the chalk and draw things in the colors I wanted and move them around, erasing what doesn't work. But this computer things is irksome. I mean, what I want to do, is to reach into the computer and move one item from an area to another. I want to change individual sections with picture size and even the colors. I make a change and go to the preview, only to find that the change has not happened. And once it does happen, the photo is too big! Ugh!

So today, I will work for a few more minutes on the layout of my blog and then it will be time for my "little miss" to awake and eat. My worries will disappear with her awakening and technology will be the furthest thing from my mind.

Sweet Treats

Two days ago, I had the pleasure of observing a play date between my fourteen and a half month old daughter and another little girl of nine months. Both had seen each other from their mothers arms on several occasions, but this was a chance to get down and under their own power, explore and interact.

Kiki arrived to play with Little Miss with much anticipated delight. Once she was on the floor, eyes wide and pacifier firmly installed in her mouth, she quietly sat looking to see what would happen. Little Miss walked right over and gave her a pat, followed by a very loving, gentle hug around the head. To all of this, Kiki sat quietly and did not object in the least. Then Little Miss, who has been noticing eyes of late, discovered that Kiki had eyes to point at and poke. Mom gently extracts Little Miss and Kiki continues to sit placidly where she is.

Soon the attention starts to be drawn to the toys. Kiki is interested in these as they are not the same ones she plays with every day. Little Miss picks up a toy and starts her regularly scheduled walk around the house with it. Kiki who is only crawling sees Little Miss high stepping away and begins to follow. Thus goes the morning.

The sweetest moment came just before Kiki had to leave. Both girls are standing at the gate that is erected across the hallway, blocking their access to the stairs. Both girls have a pacifier in their mouths. Kiki's is a large bulb attached to a short cord that clips to her shirt. Little Miss' is a smaller bulb with a little handle. The girls look over the gate, then back at each other and then at their moms. This goes on for a little while. As the moms watch, Little Miss removes her pacifier and offers it to Kiki who taking it, looks at it and then drops it on the floor. More looking, then Little Miss reaches over and takes Kiki's pacifier, which is still in Kiki's mouth. Little Miss looks at the new pacifier, then promptly pops it in her own mouth. Pulling it out, she looks at it to observe how different it is from her own, then pops it back in. Again, Kiki stands there placidly observing all that Little Miss does and there is no protest, no tears.

The moms, laughing at the antics of our sweet little girls, declare the play date a success and plan to do it again real soon.

As I reflect back over the exchange, I smile with delight over the world of discovery that is my Little Miss'.

Shopping for Little Miss

So yesterday the Little Miss and I went shopping for... well, what do you think? Adorable clothes, of course! I am currently delighting in purchasing clothes for my Little Miss. Yes, we are leaving winter behind and I am itching for spring to arrive with the warm weather it brings. So what better way to celebrate this transition then with new adorable outfits. And did I mention that my little girl has grown and actually needs bigger clothes? I don't want people thinking I am being totally frivolous.

So we are in the store, with it's spring offerings, and I find myself looking through all the dresses. Pink is a prominent color, all shades. (I honestly didn't know there were some many shades of pink until I started buying clothes for my little girl.)

There are dresses with lace trim, dresses with sheer skirts over satin, linen dresses in solids and prints, sun dresses and Easter dresses. What to choose?! My heart longed to purchase a light pink dress with a cottan lace overlay in white, but as pretty as it was, I just couldn't see "Little Miss" wearing it more than once or twice.

Then I came upon a beautiful sun dress with solid bands of medium pink at the neck and hem. The rest is white with multi-toned pink roses. The bodice is fitted with tucks and a sache that ties back from the sides of the waist. The shirt floats out and down to mid-calf. In short, it is perfection!

I tried it on her last night, for her brothers to assess. Not only did she not want to take it off, but her brothers all agreed that it was adorable. Her youngest brother kept swooning with comments about how beautiful she looked in it.

I plan do enjoy dressing up my "Little Miss" as long as I can, as I know that some day, in the not so distant future, she will have her own ideas of what it pretty or comfortable.

So, "COME ON SPRING"!! We're ready for you.

What is Little Miss Chalk Lines?

At minimum it's a mix of little girls, kids, chalk lines, and creative stuff. No doubt this will evolve over time as I settle in to share my thoughts.

Have you ever taken a box of sidewalk chalk and drawn on a driveway or sidewalk? First you have all those colors to choose from. Then you have the huge surface to draw whatever you want. Finally, you have the ability to create anything, and it will last until it rains.

If you've ever seen the Mary Poppins movie, you know it contains a great scene involving sidewalk drawings. Each square of the sidewalk has a theme, that is colorful and intricate. A feast for the eyes. In the movie, the characters disappear into the drawing for a day of fantasy.

I've also watched my boys attack the driveway with a box of chalk. They carve up roads and parking spots. They experiment with pictures and leave messages for company to read as they arrive.

I've also thought that "Chalk Lines" would be a great name for a line of clothing I might design some day. Perhaps it would be a line of clothes for little girls. Hence, the Little Miss part of the title.

Have you ever had the pleasure of sharing the world of a little girl? I'm in the midst of this experience now. My only little miss, is 14 months old and is sunshine and light. Maybe I am a little biased or perhaps I am just drinking in the difference after three boys. All I know is, my "Little Miss" is wonderful.